stayed until late in the afternoon and then went back to my parent's
house in Clacton for the night. Mark and Jane travelled to Clacton
in their car, my mother came with me. On the way to Clacton my mother
said that, the previous weekend, my father had told her he had been
talking to her parents during the previous two weeks, and to Bill,
his late brother. My father had got on particularly well with my maternal
My reaction was to think, “Oh, the decision has already
I voiced what I thought, saying to my mother, something like, “It
sounds as if the decision has already been made. It’s above
us, out of our hands.” She readily agreed, seeming to have already
come to the same conclusion.
As matters transpired, my father had suffered a massive, final stroke,
rather than a heart attack.
We visited him in hospital each day until the Friday. It was a very
difficult time for everyone involved. All of our emotions and actions
had to run their course according to what was best for each person
concerned. My mother, Mark and Jane, derived some comfort from holding
my father's hand. I did as well but was happiest, or as close as one
can be in such circumstances, sitting a little away from the bed,
closing my eyes and being with him in a non-physical way, effectively
meditating among other things. Those experiences were pleasant, very
pleasant considering the circumstances, and, in a sense, I enjoyed
them, I was linked at a level beyond just the physical.
Quite late on the Friday afternoon, while Mark and my mother were
over by the window, holding my fathers hands, Mark asked if I wanted
to take his place next to our father. I assured him that I was all
right as I was, repeating that I was when he asked again if I wanted
to take his place and hold dad’s hand.
Instead, I placed my hands on my father's shoulder and closed my eyes.
That was when I saw, at the head of the bed, my maternal grandmother,
slightly to the left; my father's Guardian Angel at his head, ten,
to the right, in order, my grandfather, late Uncle Ted (my mother’s
late brother) and Uncle Bill (my father’s late brother). At
the foot of the bed, just in front of Jane, were Lorelei and Cathy.
In that moment I heard, very distinctly, a voice say, “Our young
Airman will soon be free”. (My father and mother met when they
were both in the Royal Air Force, during the Second World War, and
he had a great regard for the Air Force.)
I was far from surprised. From what my mother had told me on the first
day, and feeling my father's aura gradually lessen over the days;
his passing was simply a matter of when. Besides, a couple of days
previously, while I was holding my father's hand, I had been told,
“The spirit is being aligned”, i.e. in preparation for
The Hospital ‘phoned about midnight to tell us that my father
had passed a few minutes before. That did not make for a good night,
though we eventually managed to get some sleep.
The following morning I was in the bathroom shaving and using the
facilities for other things you do in a bathroom. While myself sitting
down I realised I was not the only one doing so as my father was on
the bath chair lift, at least he was if I accepted my senses, which
I have found from experience, it is best to do. The circumstances
were such that it fitted with the family sense of humour in a way.
We had a very brief conversation. I do not remember what was said,
I was probably not meant to; it was simply a mater of reassurance
and part of my learning, my experiences.
After Death Experiences
Some time later, when I was back in Havant, I went to St Faith's Church
on one of my frequent visits. I had only been sitting in my usual
place for a few seconds when I felt strong energies and someone immediately
to my left. He had black hair and was wearing a white shirt with a
black tie and a grey striped suit with a double vented jacket. It
was my father as he would have appeared in his thirties.
Naturally, I was pleased to see him again. I was to do so again before,
during and after my mother’s passing in 2004 and afterwards.